From Melvin to Mel Brooks to Wilford Brimley…We get things going on this PHONES ARE BACK THURSDAY!! Before we begin our World Senior Citizen Day celebration, we get going with Opening Audio…One Night Paris was quality programming…Paris Hilton has her own cartoon coming out…It should star Rick Soloman…A large woman did over $10,000 worth of damage to a DoorDash delivery driver’s car after he took too long to deliver her chicken wings…A man questioned people’s purchase of Great Value items at Walmart…A choir teacher is under arrest after paying for acts from a student on the dating app Grindr…He apologized for his piccolo…He should have listened to the private parts song…Good to hear from Marcy and her first call back with our phones fixed was about public restroom etiquette…A man kicked down the door and pulled a gun on a man in a single stall restroom for taking too long…A man with jiggly jugs was caught on camera stealing an Amazon package from a house in Flat Rock…2 arrested, large amount of narcotics seized in Asheville…The Weinermobile will be making its way into Asheville next weekend and we are trying to get a ride-along…It is Senior Citizen Appreciation Day…We rank our favorite celebrity seniors…Side note…Walter Matheau is like a bland bowl of cereal…Think Grape Nuts or Cream of Wheat…Ever eat your dog’s food Jim? YUP…There is a five star Michelin chef that created a burger out of cat food and people love it…NCDOT to do impact study on 8-lane flyover, I-26 connector…The Menendez brothers will make their cases for parole starting later today…Asheville Mayor Esther Manheimer seeks a fourth term…A guy was popped for up-skirting women’s backsides at Walmart…A police officer was fired for stealing a woman’s underwear…He’s a wearer not a sniffer…Rosie who is not getting up skirted does not like Jay Leno…A judge read the wrong verdict in a murder trial…He said the defendant was guilty when she was actually not guilty…There will now be Ozempic for dogs…A neighborly dispute has been going on for years because a man thought people were trying to steal his chickens…Don’t do a pootinky and listen to this Thursday edition of The Rizzo & Jeff Show!!